Sex: Awareness
Understand what sexual wellbeing means, what's possible, and where you stand. About 15 minutes.
Sexual wellbeing is a significant component of quality of life for most adults. Research published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that 62% of men and 43% of women rate sexual health as highly important to their overall quality of life.
The benefits extend well beyond the bedroom. Sexual satisfaction and regular sexual activity are associated with improved cardiovascular health, lower rates of depression, and stronger relationship satisfaction. Among a representative sample of 16,000 American adults, sexual frequency was a strong positive predictor of self-reported happiness.
Yet there is a substantial gap between desired and actual sexual experience for many people. International research identifies open sexual communication as one of the strongest predictors of both frequency and satisfaction, but most couples rarely discuss their sexual needs explicitly. The result is that many people carry chronic dissatisfaction they never address.
The relationship between frequency and satisfaction also has a ceiling. Beyond a baseline threshold, quality and connection matter considerably more than frequency alone. Understanding what you actually value about your sexual life – and where the gaps are – is the starting point for meaningful improvement.
People pursue sexual wellbeing for different reasons. This site scores every sex intervention across four core values. Later, you'll set your own weighting across these four values, and the site will rank interventions by how well they deliver on the things you actually care about.
Frequency
Maintaining a rate of sexual activity that genuinely satisfies you, whether your sex life is solo, casual, with one partner, or with multiple. Initiating proactively, managing desire alignment with any partners involved, and keeping sexual activity a consistent part of your life when you want it to be.
Variety
Diversity and novelty in sexual experiences – exploring new activities, settings, dynamics, expressions of intimacy, and where appropriate, new partners. Self-knowledge about preferences, comfort discussing desires, and active introduction of novelty through whichever channels suit your sexual life.
Pleasure
The direct experience of physical and psychological enjoyment from sexual activity. Self-knowledge of your own body and responses, the ability to communicate desires clearly, and the pursuit of experiences that are satisfying for everyone involved.
Contentment
Overall satisfaction with your sexual life as a whole – feeling at peace with the role sex plays in your life, whatever shape it currently takes. Acceptance, realistic expectations, freedom from health and safety anxiety, and the sense that your sexual life is genuinely fulfilling.
The Top 0.1% band represents roughly 1 in 1,000 people. To give you a sense of what that looks like for each sexual wellbeing value:
Dan Savage has written the syndicated sex advice column Savage Love since 1991 and hosts the Savage Lovecast podcast. Over more than three decades, he has publicly discussed and modelled how long-term couples can sustain sexual frequency and novelty through open communication, negotiation, and willingness to explore. He coined the concept of being "GGG" (good, giving, and game) as a practical framework for maintaining sexual generosity in committed relationships, and has been with his husband Terry Miller since 1995.
Emily Nagoski is a sex educator and researcher whose book Come As You Are synthesises decades of sexual response research into a practical framework for understanding arousal, desire, and pleasure. Her work on the dual control model of sexual response – distinguishing between sexual "accelerators" and "brakes" – has helped hundreds of thousands of people understand their own patterns of desire and expand their capacity for enjoyment. She holds a PhD from Indiana University's Kinsey Institute.
Peggy Kleinplatz is a clinical psychologist and sex therapist at the University of Ottawa who has spent over 20 years researching what she calls "optimal sexual experiences." Her studies of people who report extraordinary sexual satisfaction – including couples in their 70s and 80s – found that the common thread was not technique or frequency but presence, authenticity, and deep interpersonal connection. Her research provides some of the strongest evidence that sexual fulfilment can be sustained and even deepen across the lifespan.
Awareness means knowing your starting point. Answer each question below – some you might know straight away, others might take a few minutes of honest reflection.
Frequency
Variety
Pleasure
Contentment
Your estimated position
Percentiles are estimates based on published research on sexual frequency, satisfaction, and communication among adults. All items in this area are scored.
You now understand why sexual wellbeing matters, what different people get out of it, what's achievable, and where you currently stand. The final step is to set your personal value weightings and see which interventions are the best fit for you.
On the interventions page, adjust the sliders to reflect how much you care about frequency, variety, pleasure, and contentment. The table will re-rank interventions to match your priorities.
Awareness assessment complete
You've built your foundation in Sex. Your self-assessment and value weightings are saved.
View Your Interventions